Earlier this year we got to watch Patti Blagojevich hanging out with the likes of Lou Diamond Phillips and Heidi Montag in the jungles of Costa Rica on “I’m a Celebrity… Get Me Out of Here!” This week we received word that former Republican House Majority Leader Tom DeLay will be competing on the next season of “Dancing With the Stars.” Welcome to the era where politics and reality TV finally come together as one. We here at Comedy.com Political Channel thought we might be able to predict who the next political reality show stars will be with our list of 5 Politicians Who Should Be On Reality TV.
5. Sarah Palin and family as replacements for “John and Kate Plus 8″
It was really tough to find just one reality show that’s perfect for Sarah Palin, because honestly, she would be incredibly entertaining on just about any of them. “Fear Factor” or “America’s Top Model” would be great fits. Hell, she might even make “Catch It Keep It “worth watching. But in the end, we figured we should go on one of her biggest strengths — being a strong matriarch of a wacky family. Imagine the hilarity that would ensue as Sarah rants to the camera about death panels, gets in fights with her husband Todd, finds out both of her daughters are pregnant at the same time or belittling “that darn media” she so dearly courts. You won’t want to miss when Levi comes over! Can someone say “sweeps week”?
4. Bill Clinton on “Celebrity Apprentice”
When he was president, Bill Clinton was known as “Big Dog” for his temper and his ability to lay the smack down and take control of almost any situation. After being out of the spotlight for several years while Hillary made her moves up the political ladder, Bill recently took a trip to North Korea to free two American journalists from the tight grasp of the evil Kim Jong-il. But Kim Jong -il is small time. He can’t run a country, so he can’t be that difficult of a negotiating partner. The real test will come when Clinton is sitting across the boardroom table from The Don. Does he have what it takes? Is Bill gonna have to choke a b*tch?
3. Mark Sanford on “Mantracker”
South Carolina Governor Mark Sanford proved that he’s adept at eluding his own staff and his home entire state for a week while he jets off to Argentina, all the while claiming that he was hiking the Appalachian Trail. How well can he escape the wiles of “Mantracker” star Terry Grant? Mark Sanford wants to get away and go for a hike? He’s got 36 hours and a backpack of supplies to get from point A to point B without being caught. Go!
2. John Ashcroft on “America’s Got Talent”
For the most part, “America’s Got Talent” is full of screeching divas, boring dance acts and shoddy magicians. What it’s seriously lacking is hardcore patriotic fervor… songs about eagles… and John Ashcroft. Former Missouri senator and U.S. Attorney General John Ashcroft was notorious for leading his staff in song, usually his own songs. The most famous of his original compositions was “Let the Eagle Soar,” a song that’s sure to bring the Hoff, Sharon Osbourne and Piers Morgan to tears. Yes, even Sharon Osbourne and Piers Morgan, who aren’t even American. The power of American patriotic music is that intoxicating. To wit:
1. Barack Obama on “Pitchmen”
One would assume that with the untimely death of Billy Mays the reality show “Pitchmen” is as equally lifeless. But there is one man who is a better pitchman than Mays and Anthony Sullivan combined. He’s smooth, he’s got pizzazz, he bested one of the best living politicians in the Democratic Primary and is currently out trying to sell America on his gigantic health reform bill. But we’d love to see him stepping up to sell maybe… OxyClean and the Hercules Hook. We’ll give you three guesses who. Swoon. We’ll take a whole case of Zorbeez.
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