Consider this your fair warning– you’ve got less than a month to get Senator John McCain something nice for his 73rd birthday on August 29th. Born almost 73 years ago in the Panama Canal Zone, McCain is a scholar, a gentleman and was this close to being the oldest old white guy ever in the White House, and his plan would have worked if it weren’t for those meddling kids.
So what do you get such an esteemed American for his birthday? If you’re lazy, you can just sign this e-card from Cindy McCain, but if you’re not a heartless Commie and you want to do more, here’s some great gift ideas.
-A framed copy of his original birth certificate, showing that even though he was born in the Panama Canal Zone, he is in fact a natural-born American citizen. Just in case.
-An oversized “Thank You” card for introducing Sarah Palin to the wider world.
-A hand-knitted sweater. Because old people can always use sweaters.
-A gift certificate booklet to Vietnamese restaurants in the DC area. Somewhere nice that he can take his rich lady friend.
-An extendable grabber claw for those hard to reach items and a phone with oversized numbers
-A T-shirt and mug that read “World’s Best Maverick”
-Alternatively, if you want to go the silly coffee mug route, you might consider a “I’d Rather be President” coffee mug and bumper sticker set.
These are just a few ideas… you’ve still got plenty of shopping time left, so get out there and don’t let us and John McCain down!
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