When George W. Bush was in office, the world saw the first of the dancing “Interest Rates Have Been Reduced Again!” banners featuring rainbows and clowns and dogs and aliens shaking their booties. When Obama came into office, overnight these banners turned into “Obama Urges Homeowners To Refinance!” spam messages, even before Obama had time to lift his pen. There was a point where Facebook especially was flooded with banners promising that Obama had sent you personally a bailout check, a pony and a tub of cotton candy, but these were short-lived.
So we decided to collect as many of these silly “Obama promises…” banners for your enjoyment. Since the originals are Flash files, you don’t get the animated action, but you can imagine.
Obama Asks Moms to Return to School #1
This is one of the earliest of these banners, with the clean and articulate Michelle Obama lookalike peering out at your internet browsing, urging you to get your degree.
Obama Urges Homeowners to Refinance!
Nothing should make you want to refinance like the looped animation of a woman turning her head an eighth of a turn that Twilight Zone story about the people stuck forever in that painting, always trying to gesture to passersby their plight.
Obama Asks Moms to Return to School #2
“Groovy man, Obama wants moms to return to school, which is like awesome, because me and my old lady dropped out back in ’72 because we thought we could make millions selling homemade tofu, but now that Obama has asked nicely, I guess I could totally send the old lady back to college.”
Mortgages Rates Drop With Obama Plan!!
ZOMG MORTGAGE RATES DROP I CAN FINALLY MAKE MONEY FROM THIS MONEY SINKHOLE I CALL A HOUSE!!! THE PEOPLE ON HGTV WERE RIGHT!!
Obama Asks Moms to Return to School #3
This banner is what started our quest to start collecting these idiotic banners. What does it have to do with moms returning to school? Well, it’s an old lady riding a stationary bike so fast that flames are coming out of the back. So, that’s… obivious. It’s a subtle metaphor for the rise of womankind over her oppressors by pushing herself to her physical limits. The flames are the conquering over all odds, like St. George slaying the dragon. It’s truly a beautiful and moving message.
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